When you yell at your children, it's not you parents who's yelling, it's you individual.
You individual with your backpack full of the education you received and the feelings and reactions of all the crises of your past. When my son sticks his tongue out at me and laughs if I scold him, the me that gives in to anger is the girl who wasn't welcomed when she felt strong emotions, who was teased by her peers, the me who was deprived of love for the mistakes I made.
When your child has a crisis, your answer is not just about the current crisis, but about all the crises that are already in your backpack. Your anger feeds not only on the destructive feelings of this very moment, but on all the destructive feelings of all the crises you have gone through in the past.
Yelling at your kids is not an answer to the present, it's an answer to your past. Start there to heal it.
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